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Written at Monday, August 17, 2009 | back to top

176..

今天是场恶梦..
一大早起来,以为有好消息 可是却是一场空欢喜..
很失望 真的很失望..
打了电话给妈妈..原以为可以很冷静地告诉她..可是我却哭了..
很放肆地哭..突然她说好久没听到我哭了,这样的我令她非常担心..对不起!
在大家眼中,家人甚至我自己都认为我是个很坚强 独立 开朗的..
直到今天我发现我不是 我不是我想象中的那样坚强.
我没有因为成绩或任何挫折哭过..可是这一次我哭了..
我哭不是因为考不好 而是因为我浪费了他们的金钱 因为我认为我尽了能力..
或也许是我期望太高了..也许是我自信心太强了..
现在我终于明白什么是痛苦流泪..
刚刚塔巴士回家时 忍不住流泪..很丢脸 但是我就是控制不了..
突然想了很多事情..原来一个人生活在国外真的是不容易..
当伤心难过时 要学会自己擦眼泪 自己承担一切..毕不了业就不用回家..
我真的不想再让父母失望 虽然他们口口声声说不要紧..可是我知道我令他们失望..
所以 我告诉我自己这是我的第一次也会是我的最后一次..

真的 很 对不起 !