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Written at Thursday, March 26, 2009 | back to top

[ The 33th day in London . Rainy Day ]

The weather coming home today matched my mood.It rained.I smiled.

You may skip it if you don't want me to dampen your sunny day good mood.I promise I won't hold it against you at all.Besides,even I would have to think twice about reading it if I wasn't me.Seriously..

I'm sad.I'm upset.I'm on the verge of tears.
I am not happy I am not happy I am not happy!!!!!!

It's been a really rough day.
I'm so tired.
Quite drained really.
But it wasn't all bad.
I had fun.
A good time and it was nice to know someone cared.
At least I'm not worth nothing.

I'm sitting in my room with the lappie on my lap with the itunes switched to the radio channel and it's playing light music ( Your classiscal choice ).How depressing is that? Very.

Snap out of it!I've got the weekend to look forward too!I've so much freedom now!why is it I am unable to enjoy that?Or at least,I don't seem too happy about it? Besides,i juz discussed about summer trip to Paris wit suan when we were having lunch.I should at least be more cheerful about it.

But then, I just seem unable to smile. Something happend. Even if I do,I obviously don't mean it. Even if I'm cheerful or laughy-like,can't you just sense how much of a show it is I'm putting on?

Sorry, I'm beginning to cross over into that drama queen side.And I'm still out of cheese so,that makes me sad too. No cheese and crackers.DULL.

I shouldn't allow myself to sink so low to such stages.It's unhealthy and nobody wants to be around a sad,depressing,emo person.So,nobody wants to be around me.Just as well maybe.

I wish someone would call me up sometime with no apparently reason besides just wanting to hear my voice.

Mayb Mayb Maybe deep down inside me, i'm just a weak person.

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Written at Thursday, March 26, 2009 | back to top

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